Jessica Biel

So apparently, Jessica Biel dumped Derek “the douchebag” Jeter. There is a God. That guy reeked of scumbag. Now it seems she’s upgrading from douche to pretty boy. US Weekly is reporting that she’s now dating Justin Timberlake.

“Jessica was picked up in her chauffer-driven Volkswagen Touareg car and instantly went to visit Timberlake when she got into Park City,”

It reminds me of this porno I once saw where this huge chick was bench pressing a dude. No Lie. Jessica Biel’s arms are bigger than both of Timberlake’s thighs.  It’s only a matter of time before Cameron Diaz throws another fit, and that my friends is a fight I would pay to see.